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[personal profile] eve11
It's Daylight savings time! So just in time to erase this past hour of extra time, I give you transcripts of the two unreleased TARDIS scenes from the series 5 box set. Does it count as wasting time if I immediately get that time back? ;)




Transcript: scene 1 between Eleventh Hour and Beast Below

[Amy and the Doctor are at the TARDIS console.]

A: Why is it a phone box?

D: Sorry, what?

[Amy walks around the console toward the Doctor, talking all the way.]

A: On the outside it said 'Police Box'. Why have you labeled a time machine 'Police Box'? Why not 'Time Machine'? Is that too obvious? And what is a police box? Do policemen come in--in boxes? How many do you get? Are you a policeman? No, look at your hair. Actually, just look at your hair! Do you ever look at your hair and think, "Whoaaaa! It just won't stop! And my chin! Look, I'm wearing a bow tie, shoot me now!" Am I gabbling?

D: A bit, yeah.

A: The question stands.

D: The first question?

A: Yes.

D: Well, it's not really a police box--which, by the way, is a special kind of telephone box that policemen used to use.

A: Right, telephone box. Theres a light on the top--do you need to change the bulb?

D: Amy, stop. Breath.

[Amy takes a few breaths until she can't contain her question anymore.]

A: Why doesn't the air get out? It's made of wood! Oh, you've got a wooden time machine--do you feel stupid?

[the Doctor stares at her.]

A: Sorry, back on the bow tie.

D: It's camouflage. It's disguised as a police telephone box from 1963. Every time the TARDIS materializes in a new location, within the first nanosecond of landing, it analyzes its surroundings, calculates a twelve-dimensional data map of everything within a thousand mile radius, and determines which outer shell would blend in best with the environment. And then it disguises itself as a police telephone box from 1963.

A: Oh. Why?

D: It's probably a bit of a fault, actually. I--I've been meaning to check.

A: What, it's a police box every time?

D: Yeah, I suppose, now you mention.

A: How long has it been doing that?

D: Oh, you know, not long.

A: Okay, okay--But what about the windows? There are windows on the outside. Where do they go? Is it a cry for help?

D: What?

A: The bow tie!

D: Ah. Bow ties are cool.

A: And you're an alien.

D: Yeah. Well, in your terms, yeah. In my terms, you're an alien. In quite a few people's terms, probably.

A: What kind of alien?

D: Well, you know. A nice one--definitely one of the nice ones.

A: So you're like a--a space squid or something? Are you like a tiny little slug in a human suit? Is that why you walk like that?

D: Amy, this is me.

[The Doctor takes Amy's hands and puts them to his cheeks]

D: This is what I really look like!

A: Well, that's fine then!

[Amy slaps the Doctor's cheek]

D: Ow! Good!

[The Doctor walks around the console. Amy follows]

A: Okay, okay. I think I'm done there.

D: Ha-ha, Amy Pond.

[The Doctor pulls a lever, mischievously]

D: You've barely started.

[The Doctor throws another lever and darts for the TARDIS doors as Amy follows].

D: 'Cause do you know what I keep in here?

[The Doctor stands with the doors at his back]

A: What?

D: Absolutely everything.

[The Doctor slowly opens the doors to nebulae and galaxies. Amy stares, mesmerized.]

D: Anything take your fancy?

A: We're in space.

D: Yeah. That's space.

A: But it can't be.

D: But it is.

A: But it's like--It's like--It's like special effects.

D: Like what?

A: I guess so, isn't it? It's not real.

D: Get out.

A: What?

D: No, seriously. Get out!

[The Doctor pushes Amy out the open door.]


Notes: 2 lines that I'm unsure about. The Doctor says either "Yeah. That's space," or "No. That's space," in that line toward the end; he flicks his eyes to the door indicating the outside and I'm not sure if he's being especially flippant or not, eg, they are actually in the TARDIS and out there is space. And then Amy says something like "I guess so, isn't it? It's not real." But I am guessing on "I guess so" -- it might be "like a show" or something like that





Transcript: scene 2 between Time of Angels and Vampires of Venice

[Amy flounces up to the console and leans seductively against it. The Doctor reaches around her like she's a monster about to bite him, and pulls a lever, then rounds the console, fiddling with things.]

A: Oh, typical bloke! Straight to fixing his motor.

D: Yeah, that's the thing, Amy. I am not a 'typical bloke'.

A: Sorry, did I do something wrong? 'Cause I'm getting kinda mixed signals here.

[Amy pulls a lever emphatically. The TARDIS clangs. The Doctor comes around and throws the lever back. The TARDIS clangs again]

D: Mixed signals? How?

A: Oh, come on! You turn up in the middle of the night, get me out of my bed in my nightie--which you then don't let me change out of, for ages-- and take me for a spin in your time machine! No, no. You're right. No mixed signals there. That is just a signal. Like a great big bat signal in the sky: 'Get your coat, love. The Doctor is in.'

D: No. No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's . . . not like that. That's not what I'm like!

A: Then what are you like?

D: I don't know. Gandalf. A space Gandalf. Or the little green one in Star Wars.

[The Doctor makes a light saber noise and spins against an imaginary foe]

A: You really are not. You are a bloke.

D: I'm the Doctor.

A: Every room you walk into, you laugh at all the men and show off to all the girls.

D: Do not.

A: What about Rory?

[The Doctor laughs and mimes Rory's rather prominent nose again]

A: You laughed!

D: No! That was just an involuntary snort! Of . . . fondness.

[Amy scoffs]

A: You are a bloke. And you don't know it. And here I am, to help.

[Amy tries to kiss the Doctor again and he backs away]

D: That is not why you're here.

A: Then why am I here?

D: Because! Because I can't see it anymore.

[The Doctor breaks away from Amy and sits down on the jump seat, leaving her at the console]

A: See what?

D: I'm nine hundred and seven. After a while, you just can't see it.

A: See what?

D: Everything! I look at a star and it's just a big ball of burning gas. And I know how it began, and I know how it ends, and I was probably there both times. Now, after a while, everything is just stuff! That's the problem. You make all of space and time your back yard, and what do you have? A back yard.

[The Doctor gets up and crosses to Amy again]

D: But you--you can see it. And when you see it, I see it.

A: And that's the only reason you took me with you.

D: There are worse reasons.

A: I was certainly hoping so.

[Amy walks away from the Doctor and stops, an idea dawning on her.]

A: Does that mean I'm not the first then? There have been others traveling with you?

D: Yeah. Sure. Loads of them. But just friends! You know--chums, pals, mates, buddies--not mates. Forget mates.

A: And out of all those friends, how many would you say--just out of curiosity--were girls?

D: Oh. Some of them, I suppose. Must've been.

A: Some?

D: It's hard to tell. It's a gray area.

A: Under half? Over half?

D: Probably. . . slightly . . . a little bit over?

A: Young?

D: Everyone's young compared to me.

A: Mm-hmmm. Hot?

D: No! No, no, no, no, no. None of them. Not really. Not at all. Probably not.

[The Doctor pauses, waving a hand noncommittally.]

D: Maybe one or two. I didn't really notice.

A: Well, this big old machine must have some kind of visual records.

D: Oh, don't--I mean, no. And anyway, they're voice locked.

A: Oh. Voice locked. So I would just have to say . . . 'Show me all visual records of previous TARDIS inhabitants'.

D: No. No, no, no. I mean, voice locked. I would have to say, 'Show me all visual records of previous TARDIS inhabitants'.

A: Oh, thank you!

D: No! No! Nooo! Nooo!

A: Ha-ha!

[A visual record of past companions flashes across the screen. They are all pretty young women. Folks with better vid capture and Old School smarts than I can give y'all the list. ETA: [livejournal.com profile] maggietimelord comes through! here is a link to the set ;)]

A: Oh! Gandalf!

[The Doctor slaps Amy's hand lightly and addresses the TARDIS by talking at the ceiling.]

D: Thanks. Thanks, dear! Miss out the metal dog, why don't you?

A: Is that a leather bikini?

[A few shots of Leela flash across the screen. The Doctor smiles, then catches himself.]

D: Right! That's it! Rory. We're going to find Rory, and we're going to find him now.

A: He's at stag night!

D: Well, then. Let's make it a great one.

[The Doctor pulls a lever and the TARDIS careens off into the Vortex.]


I started these because I wanted to pick out favorite quotes. Specifically the bits about the TARDIS calculating the best camouflage and then always disguising itself as a police box. overall, I love these scenes both to death. :D

Date: 2010-11-07 07:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stuffbearkiller.livejournal.com
ah, thank you so much! Your transcripts are very useful especially for people,to whom English is not native language))

Date: 2010-11-07 08:04 am (UTC)
mswyrr: (Default)
From: [personal profile] mswyrr
Awww! I love these. Thanks for transcribing in your extra hour!

Date: 2010-11-07 08:53 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Thank you, thank you, thank you! I haven't slept all night doing this transcript, wanted to translate these two wonderful episodes into Russian :) My English is good enough, but there're some lines espesially from Amy that I just can't understand!

So thank you again from all Russian whovians :)

Date: 2010-11-07 12:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] astrogirl2.livejournal.com
Excellent, thank you! They both talk so fast, I found some of it hard to make out. :)

Date: 2010-11-07 01:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jenlev.livejournal.com
Time definitely not wasted. And anyway...you could always do something Timey Wimey, eh?

PS. Just rewatched the famous scenes with the coat on, and then off.....totally awesome from the perspective of the rest of the season now. Whee!

Anyway, I do adore these deleted scenes. First of all, Amy Pond is good, very good. And I love the bit about the TARDIS perhaps having a small issue with police phone boxes. Heh heh heh.

Date: 2010-11-07 04:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jenlev.livejournal.com
Ditto....I've been looking forward to re-watching that scene with the experience of seeing all the other pieces of the puzzle. Nicely done by Moffat. :)

PS. I was unaware there was an unhealthy amount of times to watch those scenes? *veg*

PPS. I'm actually going to have to buy the DVDs of this season.

Edited Date: 2010-11-07 04:25 pm (UTC)

Date: 2010-11-07 05:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
Okay. I think I have the "girls" in order. There are 22 different screen shots and the TARDIS isn't being fair. She shows the same girls more than once. *chuckles*

http://picasaweb.google.com/PAMPhotographer/Girls?feat=directlink

Date: 2010-11-07 06:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
I'm not entirely certain on those two. I'm still puzzling it out. I'm fairly certain the brunette is not Victoria. It may be another picture of Lis Sladen.

I did check the background when Amy is talking about Rory's Stag party. It's the same sequence of faces in the same order.

I like how the tardis shows a lot of pictures of Leela. I think she's teasing the Doctor or making a point. lol

Date: 2010-11-07 06:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
http://picasaweb.google.com/PAMPhotographer/GirlsOfDoctorWho?feat=directlink

Darn it!!! You'll have to redo the link. I changed the album name and that messed it up.

Date: 2010-11-07 06:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
No not Nyssa.

Date: 2010-11-07 06:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sensiblecat.livejournal.com
Unlike RTD's scripts, I actually believe it's easier to appreciate SM's work from transcripts. Otherwise the jokes just fly by so fast. Both MS and AP tend to speak more quietly than the Tenth Doctor did. So thanks for transcribing this.

So, he's still a compulsive liar, and he's still sensitive about Donna. Bless.

Date: 2010-11-07 06:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
I think the only piece of the truth is when he talks about not seeing it anymore. He loves the sense of wonder of each companion. Well ... except for Jack ... Jack had seen a lot of it before. lol

Date: 2010-11-07 06:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
I'd never seen that picture of Victoria. You'd have to agree though, she does look like Lis. lol

Date: 2010-11-07 06:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
I know it's cheating, since the tardis put up the same companion more than once. But, I did identify 20 of 22 separate images. *dances*

Date: 2010-11-07 06:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
I knew there was no way I was going to id them without screencaps. The computer only captured about 4 images per shot, which is pretty quick in my experience.

Date: 2010-11-07 07:21 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Me again, whovian from Russia :)

May I ask you a little question? I'm afraid I don't quite understand the line "Do policemen come in--in boxes? How many do you get?". Can some native speaker explain me what Amy means? Does she mean that policemen walk into a box?

Thanks in advance :)

Date: 2010-11-07 07:37 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Oh, right, that was my second idea about what she means. :) So when she says "How many do you get?" she means Doctor is receiving some policemen in boxes like some kind of package? Lol, she's so funny! :D

Date: 2010-11-07 08:20 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Yeah, it's rather good. :) And again, thank you!

Date: 2010-11-07 08:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] carpetflowers.livejournal.com
I forget who clued me in to the Great Doctor Switch in that episode, but I was totally floored when they pointed it out. - clued me in please~? :D

Date: 2010-11-07 09:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maggietimelord.livejournal.com
The other issue is the "Police Box" in general. It was an object that you could make emergency calls from and had some things for the police in it.
I don't believe the boxes survived in large groups after the 70's. There are still some in the UK but I don't think I've seen pictures of blue ones unless they were definitely painted to look like the one in Doctor Who.
When the show started in 1963, they would have been common enough to be in the yard.

I agree with the answer that she's asking how many policemen are in a police box. Like asking, how many shoes fit in a shoe box. Or, how many chocolates are in a candy box?

Date: 2010-11-07 09:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] carpetflowers.livejournal.com
Ohhh, neither of them were wearing a jacket in that scene? :)

Date: 2010-11-07 09:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] carpetflowers.livejournal.com
Ohhh, wow, didn't notice before since he had his sleeves rolled up. That is amazing. XD Thank you!

Date: 2010-11-07 09:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] carpetflowers.livejournal.com
(ahaha no, I've seen it all. Thanks for you concern! :D)

sliiight tl;dr XD

Date: 2010-11-08 02:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] everworld2662.livejournal.com
Thank you for this! I could never figure out what 11 was saying when he was going on about 'Gandalf' XD You are good! ^__^

In other news, that second scene is just AMAZING. There needs to be more scenes like this, I think, because there is something a little off about 11's people-collecting and I love the subtle attention Moff's been paying to the unhealthy aspect of Doctor/companion ("Friends? Is that the right word for the people you acquire?" & "You have no idea how dangerous you make people to themselves when you're around" in particular come to mind here :)).

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