For sg_fignewton, Proportional Hazards (gen, G)

[eve11]

sg_fignewton requested anything connected with Folsom Prison Blues. Gen, humor, ~350 words, no spoilers: (1/24/07--minor edit)



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"Three months. That's gotta be a record."

Jack picked himself up off the floor as a solid white barrier shoomped down across the tiny room's only doorway. He ignored the twinge in his knee and offered a hand up to Daniel, who was staring dejectedly up at the ceiling, silently mouthing a word that could have been "ow".

"It has been some time since our last incarceration." Teal'c eyed the white walls, unconcerned.

"One hundred and seventeen days exactly." Carter almost seemed smug about it, giving the door frame a series of small taps with her knuckles as she spoke. "Definitely a record."

"Ow," Daniel said, sitting up. Then, "Whoa, nine."

"Indeed."

Jack turned to the Jaffa, incredulous. "This one rates a nine?"

Teal'c merely raised an eyebrow in Carter's direction. She was still resolutely tapping her way along the frame, and had produced a screwdriver from somewhere. Suddenly she must've found what she was looking for; she stood back and pointed to a spot that looked no different from the rest of the wall surrounding it.

"Here, Teal'c," she said.

Teal'c took two strides across the room, letting his momentum carry him into a solid, open-palmed strike at Carter's non-spot.

A panel sprung open. Five seconds of screwdriver-ing later, the door shoomped up again, and they were ghosting down the hall.

"Does that even count?" Jack whispered as they found cover in an alcove.

"It better. . . " Carter stopped mid-sentence, suddenly concerned with the tops of her shoes. Jack gave her a look, then stood back.

"You didn't."

Carter had never looked so guilty in her life.

"You . . . they let you in?" Jack answered her silence.

"Siler owed me," she said. "I used him as a proxy. I didn't do anything to influence it, sir. I just used a Cox proportional hazards model with time-varying coefficients to predict a point of failure--"

"Sam," Daniel interrupted. "You joined the pool?"

She let out a sigh. "Yes."

Jack nodded toward the hall, and they were off again. "So," he said over his shoulder as they reached the compound doors. "How much?"

She gave a wicked grin. "Steaks are on me when we get back."



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Comments

[sg-fignewton.livejournal.com]

Oh, Eve, this is just perfect. Exactly the kind of thing I was hoping you'd do!

Just bounced off and recced it, in fact. :)

Thank you for this!

[gunhilda.livejournal.com]

LOL!

[l-jade.livejournal.com]

Here by sg_fignewton

Heeee... this is great! funny & full of teamy goodness... thank you for the laugh :)

[syxp.livejournal.com]

Heh.

That was great.

sharon

[aurora-novarum.livejournal.com]

Very cute. And you know Jack, Daniel, and Teal'c have been in that pool themselves from time to time. LOL

[lem0nb0mbs.livejournal.com]

You know, you could continue this as a series and I would be utterly content.

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

Awesome...A nine. hee! Sam could totally rule the world, just by the awesome power of owed favors and Math.

[sulien.livejournal.com]

*laughing my butt off* Sam... My GODS, I love Sam! Brilliant...again!

[kuonji14.livejournal.com]

LOL, omg! Sam joined the pool and used complicated math to predict how to win! *dies

Btw, loved this line:

"Ow," Daniel said, sitting up. Then, "Whoa, nine."


I can really see Daniel doing this, and it's a great continuation point to the original fic.

[secretbutterfly.livejournal.com]

*snerk* This was simply HI-larious, as Jayne Cobb would say. I loved it. :-)

[joannindiw.livejournal.com]

*falls over giggling*

[bluemeridian]

Oh fantastic!! *giggles helplessly*

fabulous

[(Anonymous)]

Eve, this is fabulous! I love it! It's very, very, very short which makes me quite sad but I have to say that the absolute, overall wonderfulness of the story makes up for it. If you are so inclined...would it be too much to request another one? Just a short little follow up? I love this. It's just too cute. Besides, I want to know what happens back on Earth. Wouldn't it be funny if they didn't get kidnapped but got locked in a Wal-Mart or some other superstore or something? Or I don't know...anything to keep my favorite little thread-story going!!!

[thraesja.livejournal.com]

Here via Fig's recent CvF meta. Loved the original. Just found this.

"Siler owed me," she said. "I used him as a proxy. I didn't do anything to influence it, sir. I just used a Cox proportional hazards model with time-varying coefficients to predict a point of failure--"

Loved the possible implication that Sam's been Siler's proxy in the past. On what? The next time he got blasted through a door? And you had her use a Cox model? I'm in geeked-out love with you.

[sjshipper.livejournal.com]

that's awesome.

[dieastra.livejournal.com]

Hehehe! Short but wonderful!

[cesy.livejournal.com]

Hehe, great.

I love all the banter about betting at the SGC.

[marici.livejournal.com]

Ok, the base deserves whatever they get for letting Sam bet. Who even does that? Thanks for writing this!